Feeling foreign in a foreign language

Can you be yourself in a second language?

Surprisingly, studies show you’ll always have a gap between your first and second language, no matter how fluent you become. So the short answer is, "no." But the good news is that you can reinvent yourself and even be more logical

A number of studies, along with anecdotal evidence, show how people behave differently when they switch between languages. From Portuguese to English to French to Japanese, the results are the same: we’re another person when we speak another language!

Interestingly, all studies consistently showed people were more assertive in English than in their native languages. This was especially true for Japanese women. A famous study of Japanese women living in San Francisco in 1968, by linguist Susan Ervin-Tripp, shows that people completed sentences differently in Japanese compared with English. The differences were huge and fairly consistent:

1. When my wishes conflict with my family...
       • (Japanese) it is a time of great unhappiness. 
       • (English) I do what I want.
2. I will probably become...
       • (Japanese) a housewife.
       • (English) a teacher.
3. Real friends should...
       • (Japanese) help each other.
       • (English) be very frank.

The women were like two different people, depending on what language they were using!

Since language is a complex combination of culture and experience, it makes sense that those things are reflected in the words we use. And the words we use affect how we see ourselves, so new words make us feel like new people.

Instead of feeling discouraged or unnerved by that, see it as an adventure, a way to learn more about yourself and your place in this multilingual world of ours!

anecdotal evidence—stories people tell about what has happened to them; not based on scientific data.