This lesson will help you respond naturally, encourage the expert to continue, or interrupt so you can change direction.
Being clearly engaged with what the expert has to say is the final and most important aspect of rapport. It shows you are listening and following what the expert is saying.
Nothing will make a person stop talking faster than if they realize you're not listening.
So, listen actively.
There are two extremes:
- not enough reacting; and
- too much.
Not enough
In most English-speaking cultures, we do want to react with language. If you don't, a few problems can come up.
- The speaker doesn't know if you understand.
- The speaker might think you aren't listening.
- There may be awkward silences.
Too much
However, there is a danger of reacting too much. This can also cause problems.
- You might interrupt the flow of speech.
- It seems strange to react too strongly to normal information.
- You can sound fake.
Ask your teacher the following questions. As you ask them, think about the expected answer. When you hear the answer, react naturally based on your expectations.
- Nordstrom sold jeans with fake mud on them.
- How much did they sell the jeans for?
- Since 1820, global extreme poverty has declined.
- How much has it declined by?
- About a century ago, less than one in five people globally lived in a democracy.
- What's that number like now?
- America is famous for being a country of startups, disruptor companies and radical innovation.
- How much of wealth is earned, and how much is inherited?
Your student should react to this.
- If it's expected, say so. Something like, "Makes sense" or "Right".
- If it's surprising, say something like, "Wow!" or "Hm" or "Interesting."
- The jeans sold for $425.
- In 1820 it's estimated that 94% of people globally were living in extreme poverty. Now, it's estimated only 10% of people globally are living in extreme poverty
- In 1920, 19% of people were living in a democracy. Now that number is around 56%.
- It was estimated that in 1900, more than 55% of the private wealth in the United States had been inherited, rather than earned.
Alternative activity
Tell a short story about your childhood or your hobbies. Get your student to react as you are telling the story, as a native English speaker would.
- In one of your hobbies (at any point in your life), what's one thing you did successfully?
Or, if you like, you can tell this story about the novelist Haruki Murakami, famous for writing Norwegian Wood, 1Q84, and many other books.
Let me tell you about the writer Haruki Murakami.
When Murakami was 3 years old, he somehow walked out the front door of his house all by himself. He crossed the road, then fell into a small river. The water swept him downstream toward a dark and terrible tunnel. Just as he was about to enter it, however, his mother reached down and saved him. Even to this day, he remembers it very clearly. The coldness of the water and the darkness of the tunnel—the shape of that darkness. It’s scary. That's why tunnels are often used in his books; and to him, the dark tunnel is never too far away.
There is a good chance that your student didn't react at all.
If the listener doesn't respond, then the speaker will sometimes stop talking. You may choose to do this as well, then discuss why you stopped,
React naturally
The first step to active listening is to not think too much about active listening. If you’re formulating your response while the other person is speaking, you’re not listening!
Come up with few responses for the following two situations. Then, say each response until it rolls off your tongue naturally.
- You understand what was said.
- You are surprised by what was said.
Keep the conversation going
If you’d like the expert to keep talking about a topic, then you can repeat one word that you are interested in.
Expert: So, that means in the last 3 years, this industry has more than doubled in size.
Consultant: More than doubled?
Expert: That’s right. A few years ago this was a 5 billion dollar global industry, and now it’s roughly 11 billion...
Consultant: 11 billion?
Expert: Yep, that includes quite a bit though. It includes....
Practice
Your teacher will tell you some facts about a certain industry. Choose one fact and repeat it in order to get more detail.
Confirm information
You can confirm information that is unusual or surprising, or that you didn't understand.
As you progress through your project, you get a clearer idea of the key issues, facts and subtleties. Therefore, you will also be able to expect the answers to some questions. If the answers are as expected, you can continue as planned. However, if an answer catches you by surprise, you may want to confirm it and get more detail.
You can use a phrase like this:
- Would you mind repeating that last bit?
- Could you say that again?
- I didn't quite catch that.
- Sorry, did you say [...]?
You can also confirm core information: who, what, when, where, and why.
Example
You expect that global sales last year were US $7bn.
Expert: ...sales were just four billion U.S. dollars.
Consultant: Did you say four billion?
Expert: That's right.
Consultant: Is that globally?
Expert: No, I mean just here in the U.S.
Consultant: I see. In the last fiscal year?
Expert: Correct.
Consultant: So what about global sales last year?
Expert: Globally, sales were 6.9 billion.
Consultant: Ah, that makes sense.
Practice
You know that one modern steel plant in a specific market can produce about 1 million tonnes of steel annually when running at full capacity. Respond to the information you are given.
React naturally
You do not need a lot of response phrases. Nobody uses more than a handful.
Come up with few responses with your student.
Ask:
- What did you say in the warm-up to show that you were surprised?
- What about to show that you understand?
Then, have the student say each response 10–20 times, until it rolls off their tongue naturally. It should only take 10–20 seconds for each phrase.
NOTE: Many students' tone will be a little too flat and unnatural. Work on strong intonation.
For students without enough English, here are some common responses.
You understand:
- I see.
- Okay.
- Right.
- Yep.
- Mm, hm.
- Gotcha.
- Got it.
- Makes sense.
You are surprised:
- Really?
- Wow!
- Interesting.
- Hm.
- For real?
- Seriously?
Keep the conversation going
Students often miss the point of repeating a keyword. Model this language.
Ask:
Teacher: Where did you go on your last vacation?
Student [E.g.]: I went to Hawaii.
Teacher: Hawaii?
-Bad Student: Yes.
+Good Student: Yea, it was fantastic...
You can repeat any word that stands out, but ideally it will be the key point of what was said.
If your student is allowing awkward pauses, then be strict. Keep practicing. Help your student to respond right away.
Practice
Let's talk about the aviation industry.
- A Boeing 747 is made up of six million parts.
(E.g., "Six million?)- The engine alone on a Boeing 747 weighs almost 4300kg (9,500lb).
- Those engines carry it to a maximum speed of 955kph (600mph).
- The engine alone on a Boeing 747 weighs almost 4300kg (9,500lb).
- About 40% of the general population reports some fear of flying.
- Around 2.5% have what is classified as a clinical phobia, one in which a person avoids flying or does so with significant distress.
- However, only 5% of the world’s population has ever been on an aeroplane.
- Around 2.5% have what is classified as a clinical phobia, one in which a person avoids flying or does so with significant distress.
- The world's busiest airport is in the U.S.
- It's the Hartsfield–Jackson International Airport in Atlanta.
- It has been the world's busiest airport every year since 2000.
- It's the Hartsfield–Jackson International Airport in Atlanta.
Confirm information
After expressing surprise, you may want to confirm.
Ask: When you prepare your questions, do you also make a note of the expected answer? What do you do if it's different than what you expect?
Phrases like this should be relatively easy:
- Would you mind repeating that last bit?
- Could you say that again?
- I didn't quite catch that.
- Sorry, did you say [...]?
You can ask for specifics like this:
- Who was that?
- What company/city/[noun] was that?
- When was that?
- Where was that?
- Why was/is that?
Practice
Play the part of the expert in this interview. You begin and the student responds. (For an added challenge, mumble a little.)
Teacher (expert): So, 1.4 million tonnes of steel was produced.
Student (consultant) [E.g.]: I didn't quite catch that. Did you say one point four million?
T: Yep, that's right.
S: Is that just one plant?
T: No, that's company-wide. The company has two plants.
S: I see. How much per plant?
T: 900,000 in one, and 500,000 in the other.
S: When was that?
Case study
The client is a high-end modern American restaurant chain located in the city of Los Angeles, in the United States, in 2015. The restaurant chain was founded in 2000 by two brothers with the help of their families and friends and has grown to 4 highly profitable locations.
Recently, the two co-founders have been contemplating expanding their business. Your consulting firm has been retained to advise them. The hypothesis is that expanding into other geographic areas is the best way to drive growth.
Information about the L.A. market in 2015 (in US dollars):
- Average cost to open a restaurant is $54 per square foot.
- Since 2000, L.A.'s restaurant real estate prices have risen by 11%.
- Average salary costs: $40,740 for a head chef; $25,300 for a cook; and $27,570 for a server.
- Ingredient costs: $36 for a flat of strawberries.
Ask an expert about the New York and the San Francisco markets. Assume for this exercise that you expect the costs to be in the same ballpark as L.A. Make sure you clarify times and more exact places where appropriate.